What Happens After You Kill Yourself

Your mom walks in and finds you. She shakes you, desperately trying to wake you up. But, you don’t. Her tears are dripping on your face as she is screaming your name. Your dad overhears and runs into the room. He speechlessly stares at you because his baby is gone and he can’t process the scene in front of him.

Your mom is now picking out a pretty dress for your service.

Your brother looks down the driveway that you used to ride your tricycle down. His baby sibling is gone, he’s now an only child.

Your parents are no longer happily married because there is a missing piece in the puzzle that was once your family. They don’t speak to each other more than they have to. They can’t even stand to look at each other anymore because you had your father’s eyes and your mother’s hair, and that’s too unbearable of a reminder.

Your mom never leaves the house anymore and doesn’t even get out of bed. Your father quit his job and can’t sleep anymore. At school, your best friend fixates on your empty chair.

Your grandmother takes all of the pictures of you off of her wall because it’s pointless to torture herself.

The boy who broke your heart keeps calling your phone, listening to your voicemail message over and over again. Hating himself, wishing he could hear more than a voicemail again. Wishing he could hear the laugh that will never come out of your mouth again.

Your funeral was standing-room only, but you didn’t think anyone cared. Everyone was there. Everyone from your closest friend to just the guy you passed on the way to class everyday.

And so you killed yourself.

But you also killed everyone around you.

If thoughts have crossed your mind (EVEN for just a second), call the hotline or email me. Your life is too important to take, I want to be your friend through this.

Suicide Prevention Lifeline (US): 1-800-273-8255

My Personal Email: slwoodall@ualr.edu